I Choose...

I Choose...
to live by choice, not by chance;
to make changes, not excuses;
to be motivated, not manipulated;
to be useful, not used;
to excel, not compete.

I Choose

self-esteem, not self pity.

I Choose

to listen to my inner voice, not the random opinion of others.

- Extracted from a post on Facebook. I don't know who is the originator.

emo day

felt very sad for myself since this afternoon. what have achieved for my past 11-12 years.

what makes this worst : i had bad diarrhoea for whole day.

for now, i just don't feel like talking. it has been quite a while since i feel so depressed.

New part time job

Recently I take up a part time job to help my eldest brother on his business.

He asked me to help him many times. And I rejected many times and hesitated very long on taking up the job for few reasons :
1. Unable to commit full time.
2. I prefer not to work for relative.

My brother told me that I could work from home and at own time so long complete the assigned task. And added that I don't need to give my commitment as I could leave the job by giving a week notice.

I then accepted the job, hoping to earn some $ and learning knowledge on setting up own business.

To my shock, I have to take up many roles - administrative & website administrator & sales?!?! With a small fraction of my previous salary.

One of first few tasks is to mail 350 over advertising leaflets with letter out. Noted that the letter is addressed to individuals, means that I have to prepare the mailing labels and stick on 350 letters. This is very tedious and my brother kept chasing me to mail the letters out. Every night I will receive SMS from him on the status update. This task was assigned on Monday afternoon. He sent me the letter on Tuesday noon and he expected me to mail everything out by Tuesday night?!? I know the urgency but I have only two hands and ain't this suppose to be part time. I ended up work till Wednesday 5.30am and Thursday 2am. Feeling so exhausted and effort not appreciated.

Many times I wanted to give up but I keep telling myself to finish up so I don't need to do it again. This is the mindset I have when I was clearing 100 over storage boxes alone.

Now just feel like resting and doing nothing for next few days but I can't as I have a lot of tasks to work on and house chores are piling up. Guess I just have to drink more coffee for now.

Quote of the day : Positive Thinking

"Once you replace negative thoughts with positive ones, you'll start having positive results."
-Willie Nelson
For 30+ years, I have been a negative thinking person and this resulted I wasn't happy most of the time. I don't know since when I started to think differently. Partly is due to the encouragement and positive thinking from the hubby. Partly is due to my girl. I definitely want and hope she grows up to be a happy person with full of hope & optimistism and of coz positive thinking.

So for us to instill positive values to her, we got to have positive thoughts ourselves. Constantly remind myself the beautiful things in my life and appreciate and treasure what I currently have.